September 21st, 2002

boys I said how beautiful, how beautiful you are...she glitters like a star.

Times the times are different now.
As I sat, a girl wanting a boy, alone in the room with people in it.
I just can not stop the tears here.
I am, but I can not.
Here now, in my room.
I listen to robert.
I feel alone again.
I really wish things did not seem so off with C. and I.
Maybe it was the massive amounts of drink.
I tell myself that, but is was not.
He did not want to drive us.
He did not want to invite us.
He told us he had no car.
But he borrowed one to drive all the way home to get her number.
The flower says not to be "suspicious" I think he meant jealous.
But, there is no way not to be.
We are not equally loved.
One of us is above the other, like with the flower, and I get the feeling it is her.
And like the flower, I can not help myself but to hate the other woman.
How am I again pulled into this drama?
Why can't we all just stop it?
  • Current Music
    The Cure

I think I just rubbed glass into my face. Ouch.

Wind from your broken window making my hair dance.
My lips dry, licked.
I lean toward you.
You lean away.
You know.
I know.
Some things are not ok.
Things like your friend's little one.
Things like broken ideas.
I can still hear it.
The words never sounded to sweet.
Things I should not try to do.
But you knew my plan.
You were good.
You kept away.
But only a little bit.
You came back for me.
That made me smile.
All could be seen by what you heard.
Was it what you thought I would say.
Or what you wanted to hear?

Tonights quote:
she: "Are you making fun of my bike"
He: "Am I spending the night? No"
Wow, uncomfortable silence, disturbed.
Why would she say something like that to he?
Because that would be the general thought were she living on her own.