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divorced's Journal

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13th September 2002

3:21pm: **.we're chained.**
You know I ain't had much to live for--VF.


Should I stay or should I go?
I do not know about tonight. I know I am going to go tomorrow night, but I do not know if I should drop by tonight as well. Rosie and I might hang out, depending on if she calls me. I know some folk will be there tonight that I wont want to see. I first met Joseph at a TB show, and yeah. I do not want to go back to swooning over him, he is not so nice. But you know what? I am so pissed! Everyone is coupling well and I am left in the dust. It is sick. I feel like I worked through the area and came out high and dry.



Plus in class today Sebastian said a choice sentence from on the wall, to shock me, "How far do you want to go"...looking at me with his squinty eyes. I almost leapt out of my seat. I am so amorous but more so wanting a relationship. But I just can not commit when I get to one and I mess it up. It will work when I find the one. But when? Rosie estimates that definitely within 6 mnths. I will meet a love. I hope so. It seems so long.


"I need someone, a person to talk to, could it be you?...Darling this is it"--VF.



"They'll hurt me bad...they do it all the time."--VF.


So who will be there tonight so I can weigh the choices?
I think I will ride my bike over, depending, to say hi.
Last big show I missed had braces-sass the chronic-rock climb boy there.
Yeah yeah DJ M you know what I am talking about.



Five for my loneliness.




Who wants to fall in love with me? Let's drop the dramas, the stress, the story, the waste...let's just fall.
I am sending this into the world of nothing, a machine might respond, but somewhere...he will hear me and he will fall.
Current Mood: alone
3:42pm: I got a broken face.
Where is body? Oh my bones, oh my bones.
Repeat
Repeat.
Somebody got hurt.
Repeat
Repeat.



Screw heart, screw pain, screw getting back up again.


I'm all lost in the supermarket, I can no longer shop happily
I came in here for a special offer, guaranteed personality.
Who says we can not all just breathe?



(three cheers for random "emo" babble)
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