May 24th, 2002

over end die

I think I am dying.
Every breathe is a struggle, with each thought my heart stops its beating.

Is this it?

I knew all along it would not work, I allowed myself to fall in love.

The truth is, we are in love, him and I.

But, I am in love with him and he is in love with her.

Please let me live through this heart can not take another day of this pain.

My brain says that I love life, I would not want to die.
But my heart says that we thought it could not get any better...and we know it could not get much worse...what is the difference?

The truth is, there is someone out there. Someone to love me more than possible, we will have crazy love. It wont just be me. It will be us. But the truth is, I am sick of waiting. I do not know how long I can go on alone anymore.

Why. Why does this not work? If only she were nothing, and I were everything. I just want them to close it, for him to heal, for him to fall for me, and for this all to happen now. I am to young for another broken heart.

whine whine whine. If I die, I don't know what would happen.