May 17th, 2002

wow oh wow marry me now

Sugar sweet on my tongue…sour in my teeth. swoon makes my heart hurt...someone needs to marry me and take me to the beach.

So enough of that, any who, I am going to see Max’s band Curbside Resistance tonight…despite the fact that I do not think I can wait another day to see Star Wars…so yeah. Where I live now we can have pets and the shelter might let me have a lady kitten soon…I will name her Margot. Oh I will…. Tomorrow I am waking up early Shirley because down the street from my flat is a rummage sale and I really want this little old bike they had…it is red…with a red and white seat…I am going to get streamers for it…*swoon* for old bikes that rock. Oh yes.

So hmm…I am lonely as is always always…but I am relatively okay lately. I have an appointment for the head doctor next week, which makes me laugh. My mother thinks that everyone should do therapy, but I think the shrink will be overly disappointed because nothing has happened that we can talk about…no trouble…no abuse…just many a broken hearts and a secret little world within myself that seems to be breaking me some how…. Who knows…

So my oh my…you know that the show last night was good, I was overly sleepy and nervous that Chris would leave and I would have no ride…but he did not but still…I am so beat. It was good, no sad songs, no keyboards, it seemed fresh. I think they wanted it to be though. It just seemed planned; Logan rocked the drums though made me smile so big. Making strange jokes, I think he was hyped up on something…coffee maybe?

I have not had my tea for awhile…chai troubles I guess. Okay I have not eaten anything all day so I have no attention span to write my feelings down right now. In a gist, I am sad because I am lonely and set myself up to be, like people that are relatively impossible to be with, search too much, am going insane, am incredibly unhappy with my school situation but do not have the nerves to change it. And no more whining for now…this song makes me happy so fine dandy. I like this song…some hate the Strokes but this song makes me joyous. And I just noticed that a lot of people know Cursive and the band Bright Eyes (AKA my hubby Connor Oberst) and wow that rocks…they are so far away too. You make me smile. I made book of poetry and my mother took it, I did not care, I thought it was cool for her to see how odd I am because she still thinks I am normal.

Where is my mind?

  • Current Music
    Strokes...soon oh soon it will be you