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divorced's Journal

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9th December 2001

2:19pm: DREAMS OF THEE


I ARISE FROM DREAMS OF THEE
IN THE FIRST SWEET SLEEP OF NIGHT,
WHEN THE WIND ARE BREATHING LOW,
AND THE STARS ARE SHINING BRIGHT:
I ARISE FROM DREAMS OF THEE,
AND A SPIRIT IN MY FEET
HATH LED ME- WHO KNOWS HOW?
TO THY CHAMBER WINDOW SWEET!

OH LIFT ME FROM THE GRASS!
I DIE! I FAINT! I FAIL!
LET THY LOVE IN KISSES RAIN
ON MY LIPS AND EYELIDS PALE.
MY CHEEK IS COLD AND WHITE, ALAS!
MY HEART BEATS LOUD AND FAST;-
OH! PRESS IT TO THINE OWN AGAIN,
WHERE IT WILL BREAK AT LAST.




I DO NOT LOVE THEE

I DO NOT LOVE THEE!-NO! I DO NOT LOVE THEE!
AND YET WHEN THOU ART ABSENT I AM SAD;
AND ENVY EVEN THE BRIGHT BLUE SKY ABOVE THEE,
WHOSE QUIET STARS MAY SEE THEE AND BE GLAD.

I DO NOT LOVE THEE!-YET, I KNOW NOT WHY,
WHATE'ER THOU DOST SEEMS STILL WELL DONE, TO ME:
AND OFTEN IN MY SOLITUDE I SIGH
THAT THOSE I DO LOVE ARE NOT MORE LIKE THEE!

I DO NOT LOVE THEE!-YET, WHEN THOUART GONE,
I HATE THE SOUND(THOUGH THOSE WHO SPEAK BE DEAR)
WHICH BREAKS THE LINGERING ECHO OF THE TONE
THY VOICE OF MUSIC LEAVES UPON MY EAR.

I DO NOT LOVE THEE!- YET THY SPEAKING EYES,
WITH THEIR DEP, BRIGHT, AND MOST EXPRESSIVE BLUE,
BETWEEN ME AND THE MIDNIGHT HEAVEN ARISE,
OFTENER THAN ANY EYES I EVER KNEW.

I KNOW I DO NOT LOVE THEE!YET, ALAS!
OTHERS WILL SCARCELY TRUST MY CANDID HEART;
AND OFT I CATH THEM SMILING AS THEY PASS,
BECAUSE THEY SEE ME GAZING WHERE THOU ART.



MEDIOCRITY IN LOVE REJECTED

GIVE ME MORE LOVE,OR DISDAIN
THE TORRID OR THE FROZEN ZONE
BRING EQUAL EASE UNTO MY PAIN;
THE TEMPERATE AFFORDS ME NONE:
EITHER EXTREME, OF LOVE OR HATE,
IS SWEETER THAN A CALM ESTATE.

DESPAIR

WHO IS HE?
A RAILROAD TRACK TOWARD HELL?
BREAKING LIKE A STICK OF FURNITURE?
THE HOPE THAT SUDDENLY OVERFLOWS THE CESSPOO?
THE LOVE THAT GOES DOWN THE DRAIN LIKE SPIT?
THE LOVE THAT SAID forever, forever
AND THEN RUNS YOU OVER LIKE A TRUCK?
ARE YOU A PRAYER THAT FLOATS INTOA RADIO ADVERTISEMENT?
DESPAIR,
I DON'T LIKE YOU VERY WELL.
YOU DON'T SUIT MY CLOTHES OR MY CIGARETTES.
WHY DO YOU LOCATE HERE
AS ;ARGE AS A TANK,
AIMING AT ONE HALF OF A LIFETIME?
INSTEAD OF LOCATING HERE AT MY ROOTS,
FORCING ME OUT OF THE LIFE IV'E LED
WHEN IT'S BEEN MY BELLY SO LONG?

ALL RIGHT!
I'LL TAKE YOU ALONG ON THE TRIP
WHERE FOR SO MANY YEARS MY ARMS HAVE BEEN SPEECHLESS.




I HATE HIM. HE FUCKING SUCKS AND IT HAS HAPPENED AGAIN, YES I KNEW IT WOULD. AN INTREST IN ME ONLY LASTS A MOMENT. A SWEET MOMENT YES, BUT AFTER IT HAS FLEETED I AM LEFT ONLY WITH SORROW AND SCORN. I HATE HIM. WHY DOES HE CHOOSE TO BE AN ASS. AN ASS HE IS. AND HE IS IT FROM HIS OWN FREE WILL. LOVE ME! I HATE HIM.
Current Mood: crushed
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